So, I am officially in email hell. I’m not sure how this happened but I’m thinking it was subtly taking place behind the scenes whilst I was not checking my phone messages:
I took this screen capture of my inbox(es) last night…I’m afraid to look at it today. (If you're somewhere in this group that hasn't heard back from me, I'll start apologizing now. Please realize it's nothing personal. It is simply a by-product of a much larger problem.) This is all my home/personal stuff. My work email is staying up to speed…probably because I’m seeing the emails when they drop. I can’t access my Comcast emails from work. So, every day on the drive home from work I say, “I have to go through my inboxes and see what’s what, dammit.”
And then I add, “And I want to pay the bills and finish those three online courses and get my oil changed and my tires rotated and file that paperwork and do the laundry and clean out the fridge and bake a pie.”
Then I come home, jump online to visit with all of you (cause really? It’s all about priorities) and I make some half-hearted attempt to balance my checkbook and then I bail and I go to bed. Tomorrow, I’ll think about the same stuff on my ride into work.
Sometimes, I feel like I’m too far gone. Do you ever feel that way? Like you’re already so far behind, what difference does one more day make??
Meanwhile, this stack of bills is mocking me. Somebody make it stop.
In other news, (see how I’ve completely and seamlessly avoided doing what I need to do? It’s a fine art) I’ve discovered that a credit card will work in a pinch as an ice scraper for your windshield. I do not recommend this, as I’ve no idea if I’ve permanently screwed up the magnetic strip-thingie. I’ve also learned that putting a Post-It on the closet door saying “Clean Me Out!” does not mean I will ever clean it out. I’ll even keep picking the Post-It up when it loses its stickiness and smush it back onto the door...multiple times. I am nothing if not consistent.
Did I mention what Connor (13) wants for Christmas?? It's called a ghillie suit:
I tweeted this to my friend, Gigi. She's like, "WTF?!" I said, "EXACTLY." Isn't it great how well we can communicate, on so few words? Translation: You can't always get what you want.
Also, I’d like to know how I’m supposed to swish that ACT rinse in my mouth for 60 seconds when I’ve got a stuffy nose. I mean, I’m good for about 15 seconds and then I gotta spit. And why is it that I still don’t seem to understand that it’s better to just order it online…’cause by the time I get my sorry ass to the mall, it would have been already delivered?? If anyone has the answers to these questions, please email me.
Oh, wait…
Looks like you have a LOT to get done there Kathryn. Come to think of it, so do I; I'll get on that in... a... sec *goes back to check facebook*
:)
xoxo
I'm STILL like WTF Connor? You'd be much better off with cologne or something!
And do you see what happens when you don't check your voice mail, Kathryn?!! All hell breaks loose!
By the way, when are you going to send me that super-secret email address/phone number that ALWAYS, NO MATTER WHAT gets answered?
And? Dammit! I would have been first to respond, but I had to use spell-check and make sure my punctuation was correct.
I say close your eyes and hit the delete button. Well, I guess you can't see the delete button if you have your eyes closed, but you know what I mean. Clean slate, baby. That's the way to go. Then when someone asks why you didn't respond to their email, you can deal with it then. Those are the only ones that really matter.
What exactly would Conner be doing with the scary suit? :)
Tip your head backward and convulse violently. Then after you've said no to Connor's Bigfoot aspirations. Skip the mouthwash for a good old fashioned water. Your mouth will survive an evening.
I'm going to jump on board the WTF wagon with the ghillie suit. Other than WTF all I can ask is why? If it's for manhunt, he is so much more intense than we ever were.
I think you should buy Conner a Goonie suit instead. You know, the nice looking black jacket and pants that he'll need in a few months for homecoming. Just an idea. But fo' rizzle, what does a NYC kid need with a SNIPER SUIT?? Like can you walk down Broadway and not get arrested with that thing on? Of course, I'm assuming you're a midtown girl, and not an uptown girl. Come to think of it, you seem more upper west side to me..... But I'd still meet you at Cosmo's for a slice any time. It's a bit of a drive for me though. (But I digress)
Delete the crap, pay the bills when you can, and clean that pile in your closet when you damned well feel like it. It's your house, and nobody is judging you by your closet..... Yet.... :-) Fight the good fight. You'res TRULEY....
Is he into Deer hunting/paintballing or extreme hide&seek.
On the list of mail, hi-light the whole lot then hit del-all. If they matter they will get back to you. Except the ones that look if they have money in them, Pay Pal and so forth.
On the mouth-wash. Don't be greedy, there is little need to fill your mouth half 'ill do, it's not wine FFS.
And is a Closet and a Wardrobe the same thing in your money. For us a Closet is more substantial, fundamentally structural feature. As in Water-Closet, really a room on it's own.
On the Bills, toss them up in the air and pay the one that fall face up.
Stop writing such bloody brilliant posts so no one ever comments. That's what I do.
Is Conner going to bring home the meat? It looks as if he's into bow hunting. I'd say I'm more important than bills, but I that's not true as I don't impose late fees? On the other hand, I have been a rather bad blogger lately, too.
What the hell is he going to do with a ghillie suit? Do you have a burgeoning sniper in your family? Have you considered therapy for him?
To my shame I just stop bothering when I get snowed under. I'd recommend the same for you. Just let it all go. You'll find it simple to prioritise in a few days time cos you'll easily recognise what has to be done and what doesn't.
Have a nice day, Boonie
I think you should order the suit but wear it instead of giving it to Connor.
I feel that way often actually, I have 2 laptops for work and 2 different email addresses AND all my personal stuff too. Sometimes I feel like I'm sinking in it all, but then I realize it's ok there aren't email police, so neglecting it won't get me arrested. ;)
Don't worry you'll figure it all out, then share the answers with us. Well, hopefully anyways (I mean the sharing part, not the figuring out part).
Mona and Jawonio get their own mailboxes and I get squat.
Thanks a lot, K.
Say "hi" to Lee Burns for me.
Ummmm- Under Finacial--The Fidelity??? Is that a Group.....???? or a Personal Stae....snicker
And tell Connor- to wait till srping , put Crazy glue and duct tape all over him--and Go roll in the Woods!
Sorry Connor-- I just bought all my Camo for next years season---sigh....shift shape!
Bless you Both!
Dobie Ghillis!
Juan
Okay, wow, BREATHE Kathryn, BREATHE. Chores are meant to be put off continually-that's the whole point.
But I'm wondering why Connor would want that for Christmas...?
(Btw, what's a "Blug idea"?)
You know, that Ghillie suit (not to be confused with Gigli suit) would be sort of an investment. When Connor has it on, you could rent him out as a scarecrow to local farmers. Of course, you could cut him in for 25 per cent...
Fierce: You're a funny girl. You've been pretty busy yourself of late. What's going on up there?? Are you eating? You'd better be eating.
Gigi: You HAVE the super-secret phone number that always gets answered! It's called my Blackberry and coincidentally, you and Fierce (above you)are both on my contacts list. That's about as in touch as you can get!
Kimberly: I like the way you think, sweetie. Just close your eyes and purge! It's too late for me...just save yourself. I asked Connor why he wanted the scary suit. His only response is, "You wouldn't understand." Whatever. I'm not buying it.
I have started making lists and leaving them right next to my computer. Does it mean anything actually gets done? Sometimes. There is something nice about ticking things off. But, items such as cleaning out the closet or organizing my health insurance paperwork stay unchecked for months. This seems to be a global problem. I have no help for you my dear. Just keep blogging. Keeping the priorities straight is critical.
Sadly, I knew what a ghillie suit was without the picture. Does Connor hunt or does he want it for paintball. Or is he practicing to be a CIA agent or something?
I'm probably going to text you because I'm pretty sure you haven't read my blog recently or you would have texted me with a "WTF?".
Have fun with the email inbox from hell. Lol.
♥Spot
Dorn: HA. I can do all those things...and I believe I shall. I have done some serious catch-up this weekend. This electronic mail will NOT be the boss of me. I've also discovered the electronic Post-it for my desktop. We may be in trouble...
Lauren: I know, I know. Evidently, according to Connor, we girls cannot comprehend the value of the ghillie suit. If you ask me, that speaks volumes about the difference between the genders. Don't you think?
.end transmission: A Goonie suit! Ha! Could you imagine? I have no idea what Connor's thinking. Maybe he just wants to disappear into the crowd? I'll meet you @ Rigoletto's on Columbus between 69-70th. If you leave now, you'll make it by the end of the weekend, right?
I think you should move bake a pie to the top of the list. Rhubarb please.
I think that there would nothing more entertaining that just sitting in an armchair watching you...the frenzy, the panic, the constant movement...and write down what was actually accomplished.
Naw, I wouldn't write that stuff down...simply because I approve of you the way you are.
And that's why I don't have time to go to the gym, to the grocery store, to get my laundry done, to bake tons and tons of goodies to freeze to bake fresh at Christmas...cause I too have my priorities and they are to visit my dear blog friends like Kathryn and to see that she is so much MORE far behind than me that it makes me feel much better about how "on top" of things I really am.
Thanks for easing my conscience Kathryn! (And I say hit the delete button too)
And as for Connor...WTF? But really...that's adorable, that's why I love boys! Ok, that sounded wrong, I mean other peoples boys, I mean children, I mean....OMgosh, I mean thats why I love the kinds of toys/gifts that boys want...cause they are so creative!
I can SO relate to this! It’s all just TOO much really… too much! LOL!
I would just mark them all as read and assume that if it was really important they'd get back to me.
Vince: I know it's not deer hunting. Actually, your guess is as good as mine. Probably better, actually. I love your idea with the bills! Pay the one that lands face up....ha! As for the closet....ummm. You definitely don't pee in it...but it's built into the house? Not a stand-alone. Does that help? I'm thinking no...
Runnergirl: Oh, that's not it! The "comments" portion of un-answered emails is merely a formality...a back-up, if you will. It's supposed to cover anything that pops through after the fact. It's not working out quite the way I'd envisioned!
sage: No...not a bad blogger. You're just a busy one. And I absolutely agree that you're way more important than some stinkin' bill. But yeah, there's that late fee....
JP: I KNOW. I said the same freakin' thing! He's claiming it's a gender thing, so that means that you, as a guy are supposed to understand. If you don't, then there's no hope for me.
Boonie S: I hear you...I totally do. There's no shame in that. It's called being overwhelmed. I think we all reach a point where we shut down.
HulaBuns: Are you sure there aren't any email police? 'Cause sometimes, I could swear there's somebody staring back at me, right through the monitor! Creepy, right?
Straight Guy: Oh, God...this made me laugh. I'd no idea anyone was looking at it that thoroughly! Well, if you want equal room in my inbox, you'll just have to email me more than once a year. Oh, and Lee Burns says "hey". (He's the general manager at the Toyota dealer where I get my car serviced. It pays to know people in high places.)
John McElveen: Oh, you are too funny! I'm still laughing at the image of Connor rolling around in the woods with duct tape all over him...this was HILARIOUS!
Oddyoddyo13: Okay. (Breathes deeply.) "Blug" is "blog" in Kathryn-talk...'cause I'm not a huge fan of the word "blog". I have no idea why Connor wants what he wants. He's a BOY. We may never know. Honey, you should be related to me, with your ability to reason putting things off continually. Love that!
Alan W. Davidson: Well, you had me totally on board until you got to the 25%. I'm thinking more along the lines of maybe 5...'cause I'll have to cut you in for the idea and all. I say we stick him in a cornfield for a "trial run" and see how it goes. I'll tell him it was your idea, of course.
Jen: Honey, you and I are on the same page. Paperwork sucks...and if I don't know how to fill it out, it'll take me that much longer to do it. I like ticking things off as well. I've been known to write things like "change batteries in remote" just so I can tick them off. Is that a global problem?
Spot: You're spot-on with this comment. (Sorry. I couldn't resist.) I'm also sorry you know what a ghillie suit is. I'm not sure why I'm sorry...it's just how I feel. I think Connor hopes to play paintball...or laser-something...or perhaps he's going undercover and is sworn to secrecy. I'm putting the CIA on speed-dial.
Missed Periods: Okay. I can also add "find world peace"...'cause the chances are about the same at the rate I'm going.
Jerry: Damn straight! If you ever decided to commit my actions to paper, I'd have to contact someone in a covert position to have a tawk with you. For I must appear as sane, clear-headed and mature...and I'm thinking you'd depict me as slightly wackadoodle. And that my dear friend, will never do.
Alicia: LOL! Aw, honey...you are a HOOT! You never fail to make me laugh. Yes, my main goal in life is to make everyone look better than I...and I think I do a stellar job of it. I mean, that's really the only reason I fall behind, is to make everyone else look good. Well. I guess my job is DONE!
Miss Sara: Aw. I'm both happy and sad that you can relate to this! It's so easy to fall behind, right? And then you fall a little further behind...and before you know it? **BAM! You're completely snowed under!
Christopher: This seems to be the consensus...and it's A-O-K with me. Actually, I got thru a good portion of them over the weekend...and I was relieved to see that I'd caught a good many of them on my Blackberry. And yes...hopefully the ppl that matter won't give up on me. I can only hope...
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